Random Non Sequiturs+ 2

When a man turns 20, it's very important that he never uses more than two exclamation marks per email.


Rn'B and Sushi Groove:  What to listen to when you don't actually like music, where to go when you don't actually like sushi.  But would like to pretend as if you do.


I think the real reason why Indonesians do Pre-Wedding photography is because they realize how horrible and stressed-out they will look on the wedding day itself.


The slower paced a movie, the better the reviews. Throw in a healthy dose of navel-gazing and voila’, ... you got yourself an Oscar.


You know you are an Indonesian fashion designer if you have someone hand you a cellophane-wrapped bouquet of  flowers when you do your kegirangan victory lap at the end of your show.


Never trust a man who smells of Drakkar Noir.  Especially if he wears gold chains and has chest hair.


You know you're a "Bule with a Mission" when you find it necessary to make a point that you have a favorite Indonesian band.  And to make sure everyone knows about it, so help you God.


If you gotta grind, grind deep.


Never button the lowest button on your suit jacket.  And if you think it's okay to leave the label stitched on the sleeve... well, we're not even gonna go there, are we?


Live in Jakarta once in your life.  Leave before you find it perfectly acceptable to ship your Harley Davidson by truck so you can ride it in a convoy in Bali.


The other day I was watching a documentary on aircraft carriers on the Discovery channel.  On the early carriers, aircrafts would land on the flight deck parallel to the long axis of the ship's hull, and park at the end of the runway.  If a jet overshot its landing, it would crash into the parked aircrafts.  It took a decade of fiery deaths before someone finally came up with the idea of an angled runway, so the landing jet would not hit the parked aircrafts and simply go airborne again.  Keep this in mind the next time you have the urge to beat yourself silly over a mistake you have made.


If you cannot be happy on your own, you will never be happy with someone else.


When you ask someone what his favorite movies are and he answers with names of directors instead of movie titles, its his way of saying "I am hipper than thou, you puny pedestrian scum."


Either that, or he works in advertising.  Same difference.


Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he'll ask you to pay for the sewa lapak and some uang rokok.


Yes, I do consider riding an ojek during rush hour in Mangga Dua to be an extreme sport. How I have managed to keep both of my kneecaps intact is beyond me.


The smaller her dog, the more emotionally fragile she is.


When my parents were struggling immigrants in the '60s, all we could afford were the cheapest cuts of a chicken, namely the backs and necks.  For the longest time we thought that was all a chicken consisted of, until we saw KFC commercials on TV with slow-motion tumbling pieces of drumsticks, wings, and breasts. My sister and brother said “Hey.... hold on... what part of a chicken is that?”


Now is it just me, or does "klappertaart" really sound like a dutch sailor's venereal disease?


When a man turns 25, he should refrain from dating women who have an aversion to DVDs with laurel wreaths on its cover. Regardless of how much of a hot babe she might be.


Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes with her arms folded.


The worse the spelling, the higher the probability he was educated in the U.S.  Definately.


The girl at the italian ice cream stand at Ciwalk is really cute.  Don't tell her you read it here.

Comments

[dun]

"The worse the spelling, the higher the probability he was educated in the U.S. Definately."

I have to disagree. I can 'insure' you that 'definately' is also one of the common mistakes made by 'independant' and 'oppinionated' people who were born and bred in Britain, happen to work with 'docters' and 'proffesor'.

Or maybe I'm just real anal when it comes to spell-checking.

[Adrian]

You scary psychiatry people you.